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dumb fuck

by Bryce Bishop

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1.
dumb fuck 03:26
you called me up again for god knows why another wasted night with you telling me about how all your friends are not enough and i am pretty tired i know it’s early there but i’ve been up for thirty hours taking twenty minute showers stuck in bed i can’t get up and i can’t bear to talk about us more tonight i haven’t felt the same way about somebody since you left please leave me be so i might find some peace i know i’m to involved at best or just obsessed at worst with the memories i have of you pull them out, my aching tooth let me go 'cause i can’t trust myself to one last call you told me what you thought what you thought but i’ve tried to talk about this we’ve brought this up before how could you call this a blind side could you put me at fault i was crying on the sidewalk you said “if you’re so sad then why are you doing this?” you said “if you’re so sad then why are we...” "trying to talk about this?" we’ve brought this up before how could you call this a blind side could you put me at fault i was crying on the sidewalk you said ,“If you’re so sad then why are you doing this?” you said, “If you’re so sad then why are we...” were you that convinced then we’re choked up on the phone about how you said you’re broken and i’m the one who pushed you off were you that convinced then we’re choked up on the phone about how you said I won’t open up and i thought, "not to you. i won’t" and i thought, "not to you. i won’t" and i thought, "not to you. i won’t" and i thought, "not to you. i won’t"
2.
One, two, three Am I Too cold to care about Do you hate to talk 'cause it brings you down is it Too much to say aloud Are you tired of this Can we fuck it out am I Too cold to care about Do you hate to talk 'cause it brings you down is it Too much to say aloud is it Too much to say aloud "Is it me?" (Ion know) "Is it different?" (Yup) "Are you tired?" "Am I anxious?" We both asked and tried to respond but Sleep deprivation's never been honest So we sat In silence (Sh) "Why can't you talk to me?" We both asked and tried to respond, but I'm just quiet I'm just quiet Fucked up tough love getting upset Try to ignore all the shit you told Your friends about my broken thoughts and What I said or tried to Tough luck got fucked by the solitude Blank walls, cheap room, creeping want Of sensory content Alone and at fault I'm in tears on the floor I know it's "just another freak out" Little bitch sit down It ain't really that bad Won't you shut your mouth 'Fore you take another lap of the house Stop pacing you're acting insane All this talking to yourself won't help "I'm well! I've never felt better than this!" "I'm great! I've never felt better than this!" "I'm well! I've never felt better than this!" "I'm great! I've never felt better than this!" Do you wish you'd settled down Thirty, forty minutes out the city Somewhere quiet, but Close enough so that you could still go see your friends You'd be working as a teacher He'd be doing something stable Twenty-seven, everything Would be going according to plan Do you wish you'd settled down Somewhere quiet out the city Finished study finally starting up your life like you had said You'd be working as a teacher He'd be doing something stable Twenty-seven, everything had gone according to plan Am I Too cold to care about Do you hate to talk 'cause it brings you down is it Too much to say aloud Are you tired of this Can we fuck it out am I Too cold to care about Do you hate to talk 'cause it brings you down is it Too much to say aloud is it Too much to say aloud

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released September 19, 2023

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Bryce Bishop Melbourne, Australia

~marinating in nostalgia~

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